It’s my very first blog post ever. And there are so many feelings involved.
Jittery (probably due to coffee).
And most of all: Anxiety.
The last feeling is the main reason that this blog now exists. Over the past year I have been literally anxious for every minute of every day. I have been applying to competitive graduate schools, taking the GRE, planning a wedding, preparing myself for marriage, working a life-sucking job (or 2), paying my first round of bills, taking classes, and still trying to maintain contact with the outside world (aka, friends and family). On top of those things, I discovered so many chains in my past that were prohibiting myself from letting go of issues that were continuing to keep me in a lowly state. This anxiety took over my life, and I began to long for the joy that I knew that I had the potential to possess.
Long story short, after several talks with my new husband (who gets the best encourager award) as well as an uplifting chat with a good friend, I have decided to make the choice to find joy everyday. Yes, everyday. I want to see the silver linings in the world. I want to dance alone in my room (or in the rain, whatever). I want to take care of myself. I want to learn new things. I want to love life. This is the beginning of my journey to end anxiety and begin a life of joy.
This blog is my accountability tool as well as a type of measuring stick. I want to keep myself accountable with HOW I am choosing joy, and hopefully one day share this journey. I want to see progress within myself, in my marriage, in my friendships, and in my relationship with the Lord.
Here’s to silver linings.